Love Stories in Rehab
“I don’t know what I’d do without her, I tell ya, she’s my sunshine and my moonlight” Lenny swayed, head cocked to one side and secured in a neck brace, back and forth in his chair during rehab. He watched his bride leave the gym, she had just kissed him a few times and was headed to the room.
“You know, she’s the best thing that ever happened to me.” He turned to me, winked an 80 year old eye and smiled.
“You know, we’ve been married 14 years, yea, I know, we got married later in life, but she’s a keeper”
A keeper for sure.
Lenny’s story is not unlike many spinal injury patients in rehab. The floor is alive with wives, girlfriends, mothers, and friends. Many stay with their loved ones and work through the daily workouts with them, stay by their side at night, feed and care day by day. There are so many small and important needs to meet. It’s a new way of life for everyone, and everyone is going to have to learn a new way of living. I talked to one of the other patients today, likening the method of relearning how to live something like living in another country. You don’t know the language at first, and you have to learn pretty fast that normal ways of communicating won’t work. So you become really good at body language, using the few words that you do know to make sense, and discovering that life is a lot different than you are used to. At the same time, you are able to notice other things, become aware of your surroundings like you haven’t before, and grow in other areas. My own personal experience of living in China I think really helped me to process in writing much more clearly as speaking in English wasn’t always and option. It’s a good thing that so many are learning this new life together. Definitely a powerful way to grow in love, real love- the kind that you choose when you wake up and when you lay down weary from the day’s tears and laughter.
There was a day last week when the nurse came in and was explaining to Emily exactly what kind of care Brian would need, and what her responsibilities would be. Emily sat on the bed, one hand on her moving tummy, the other resting on Brian’s knee. The list of care-needs would come close to overwhelming for anyone, and both looked intently at the nurse as she explained that Emily did have to learn what to do for when they went home and would not be in the hospital. Emily, not missing a beat, spun herself around, grabbed Brian’s hand and in a voice sure and strong spoke words of truth;
“I love you Brian.”
“I love you too Emily” his words softer and just as heart felt.
Em and Bri are the talk of the floor, obviously. I think that Brian would whole heartedly agree with Lenny and his love that indeed “she’s a keeper.” Em is with Brian, his right hand woman, day and night.
This morning got off to a rather rough start because of a sleepless night and a long doctor’s appointment early in the morning. Brian has a bit of a sinus infection causing a headache. But, the doctors have changed some medications, and as you all probably know, will be changing his trache as well. I’m not sure if that was happening this evening or not, but the respiratory therapist was in the room quite a bit today reassuring the two that the metal trache would indeed be a better device. So, they wait for that to happen.
I arrived at the hospital quite a sight myself, carrying Rubbermaid shelving units the size of me, jerry rigged onto my rolling duffel bag.
After discovering via a bright orange envelope on my windshield that I had “mis-parked” last night I realize that I will be well acquainted with the NY motor-vehicle department (ironic that I had actually parked in a handicapped accessible spot not noticing the dip in the sidewalk next to me. Perhaps I could plead that I’ll do manual duty to help people in wheelchairs get around, would they give me a break??). Hoisting the “luggage” through the subway was a trip, I think I scared a few people with my bags. Such things are not foreign to New Yorkers. City life is an entirely different ball game.
Emily was thinking about that as well today, how different it is to shop at P&C where everyone knows your name compared to the local Manhattan culture. But, as in every community, there are people who you see again and again. Em and the front door guards are quite close--- he tells her that he keeps an eye on her every time she goes outside to catch her breath. Today the Egyptian man who sells “Halal Meat” walked by us and said hello to me (I bought some lunch from him last week) and asked how Em and Brian were doing. Rebecca who lives across the street from the hospital just called to check in and see if there was anything they could help with. My roommate Bekah, told me that last night at her prayer group she told them about Brian and Emily’s time here and a Hungarian girl in thick accent prayed for them. Community can be found anywhere, and it just so happens to be here.
Thank you all, dear friends, for being part of this community via your love, notes and prayers. Keep em coming. And, if you want to send cards to the hospital:
Mount Sinai Hospital
1415 Madison Ave
KCC 2 South Room 210
Brian Keddy
New York, NY 10029
Or, packages to Keddy's new home:
Emily and Brian Keddy
201 Irish Settlement Road
Colton, NY 13625
Hasta luego for now,
Katie
